“Fuck! Those God damn dogs are barking again!”

Every morning at 6:45 am the neighbor’s dogs yell like the hounds of hell searching for a victim. Sitting straight up in bed, Gypsy covered her ears for the millionth time this month. Until a month ago she could sleep until 8, but the day that damn moving truck showed up everything changed.

Edging her body to the side of the bed, she grabbed a soft pink robe on an oversized Queen Anne chair. It was time to confront the problem, or at the least, yell at the mutt so the owner could hear her anger. It was still dark out for Christ’s sakes. Shuffling through the hall, the moment Gypsy opened the back door she screamed at the top of her lungs, but the last of her words stuck tight in her throat.

“Shut the fu…..”

Across the yard there stood what had to be a 6ft 5-inch male with no more clothing on than the day he was born. Stark naked, his body that of a Greek God, the man turned to the sound of the voice. He never even tried to hide it. Holding a coffee cup to his lips, peering over the brim of the cup, Gypsy could see the amusement on his eyes. Was he fucking smiling? God dammit, that man shook her to her core. Sure, she had seen plenty of naked men, but this one ripped her soul apart without even touching her body.

“Sorry about the noise. Rosco is just saying good morning to the neighborhood,” laughed the male.

Not once did this man even attempt to cover himself. His cock hanging, he didn’t even blink at being caught naked outdoors. Her mouth gaped open only seemed to amuse the man more. His laughter a booming chuckle, he turned to the door and disappeared inside along with the dog.

“What the fuck was that?” Gypsy asked.

She stood there for a moment or two before walking back into her own house, but now she couldn’t unsee it. His perfectly chiseled chest, tight abs, and well, that cock. God damn, if that was soft, she couldn’t even imagine it in an erect state. She had seen a few cocks in her days, but well, that one was impressive.

“How dare that man come outside like that. I could call the cops for indecent exposure,” she laughed.

Instead, she pushed the button on the coffee maker and honestly thought about a cold shower. Her cheeks warm, she placed a hand on one, shivering from the contrast of her hand and face. She was sure he saw her expression. His laughter when he left was downright cocky. Tapping her fingers on the tile counter, hoping to make the old pot drip faster. She had a Kerig on the other side, but there was something about that drip and gurgle of the old machine. Plus, it was seasoned with layers of past pots of that black gold.

A cup poured, she brought the steamy liquid to her lips, shivering the moment her eyes closed. All Gypsy could think about was that man standing there with coffee in his hand and his dick hanging long and proud. He had gotten into her head, and she needed to remove him as quick as he came.

“Alright, enough. Cold shower. Now!” she laughed.

A cold shower was needed, but Gypsy was someone who couldn’t even touch the cold water without her skin aching. Turning the shower on scalding hot, she dropped the robe and walked into the falling lava hot water. That might not take the edge off the anger she felt, but it would shock her system back to some normalcy.

Leaning her head against the shower wall, her hand slid down her belly, not stopping until she reached the soft skin above her pelvis. A sudden flicker of electricity flowed through her entire body, causing a moan to escape. Breathing deep, Gypsy pulled her hand back, pouring a liberal amount of soap in the palm of her hand. A bright floral fragrance filled the shower as the bubbles built in her hand. Biting down on her bottom lip, she slid her fingers down, massaging over her swollen mound. The only thing in her mind was that man. God damn that naked man.

Cupping her pussy, Gypsy curled her little finger, parting her swollen lips. Starting at her tight opening, she slowly moved upwards. How could that stranger get so deep in her head that she found herself masturbating to his image?

“Fuck,” she purred.

Tapping two fingers against her clit, Gypsy felt her own heartbeat beneath the tiny swollen nub. She was soaking wet and not just from the soap on her fingers. Slowly closing her eyes, one hand on the shower wall, she rubbed small sudsy circles around that bundle of nerves. She would need to steady herself or fall to the shower floor in a warm puddle of unforgiving lust.

Imagining that her fingers were that stranger, she pushed three of them in her tight entrance, stretching the tight pink rim. It hurt, but the pain was worth it all. She wanted him to stuff her full of that hard cock and not stop until his seed was buried deep inside her throbbing cunt. At this point it wasn’t a beautiful little pussy, but a carnivorous demanding cunt. Never in her life had she felt this way. Gypsy prided herself on her control, but that was flowing down the drain along with all her self-respect.

“Fuck me, please,” she begged.

In and out her fingers stretched her tiny walls, each thrust bringing her closer to orgasm. She never came quick, but this time the blinding wave of fury rupture her entire being. She was cumming, and it was hard enough to drop her to her knees. God damn, that man burned a vision deep inside of her soul.

DING DONG

Scrambling to her feet, she balanced herself for a moment before grabbing her robe and wrapping it tightly around her. It was 7 am, and unless it was an emergency no one should be ringing her bell!

“What!” she growled, pulling the door open wide.

Standing in front of her was the very same man that had just made her cum. Wearing a pair of shorts and t-shirt, the man knew the moment she opened the door what he had done. That shitty smirk on his face said it all.

“Hey, just wanted to apologize. Are you okay?” he asked.

Nodding her wet head, Gypsy stood in the doorway with sin written all over her face. Her cheeks flushed; she grabbed the door jamb to steady herself before speaking.

“Yes. No worries, just please,” she begged, breathless, “Wear some clothes next time.”

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I’ve always been a little confused about why some men get attracted to performing oral sex on men. It repulses others. Growing up I thought that if a man did oral sex on another man, he was gay. Sure, my family was a little conservative, but isn’t that true? If it is, there are a lot of men out there hiding in the closet.

My first experience with this was eye opening. Growing up, I was always a tom boy. Again, shocking. I loved playing in the dirty, toy cars, and climbing trees. My best friend at the time was a boy whose name I won’t say. God, what if he reads this blog? He was always a little on the feminine side, but that might be because of me too. To please my mother I forced him to play with barbies. She worried that I would grow up with the boys and not the girls. Sorry Mama, I knew what I was doing.

Oral sex was the last thing on my mine, well, until I watched my first porn.

After watching that first xxx rated movie, I gained enlightenment on many things. One being that cum looked delicious. So white and creamy. One could consider the cream on top of the cherry. After that, I had sex with a guy, and if I am being honest, it scared me to death. No, we didn’t use a condom and the last thing I wanted was to get pregnant. A good little Catholic girl doesn’t do that. It would shame the entire family, plus ewwww. I never want any crotch goblins to ruin my life.

Immediately I sought the help of my best friend. I explained what happened and the smile on his face scared me. As he explained, “The only way not to get pregnant is if I suck all that out of you!” I screamed, well, not too loud, but it was a scream. He wanted to perform oral sex on me to prevent me from getting knocked up.

Unable to think of another way, I agreed.

Hiding in the bedroom I showed him my shame. Removing my soiled panties, I laid back on his bed, spread my legs, and allowed the jizz to flow free. As shocking as it was, nothing compared me for the next few minutes. My legs open wide, he climbed between them and shoved his entire face in my slit. It was my first AMSR experience. He sucked on the tiny hole, slurping up all the cum. His tongue pushing in to make sure the walls sparkled when he finished. I’ve never seen someone devour cum like that since. It reminded me of a man starved getting his first meal in forever.

“You need to promise me that if this happens again you bring it to me!”

Of course, I agreed. Who would turn down vacuum lips? Not me. Plus, I came when he cleaned me, so that was a bonus to the entire experience. What happened next was the real eye opener. I told him that the same boy wanted me to give him oral sex. Not knowing anything, my best friend assured me that he could show me how. Now it was convincing the other boy to let him do it, and not me. I only wanted to watch. You know, learn by example. If he wanted oral sex he would have to accept it from another guy, not me. It wasn’t hard to convince him. A blow job is a blow job no matter who is sucking.

I watched my best friend get on his knees and take every inch of that cock down his throat. Shocked, I gagged a little when I heard the slurping sounds, he made. It reminded me of when my sister ate spaghetti and sucked up the wet noodles. Loud and wet. The guy getting head didn’t know what to do. He stood there with his mouth wide open and moaning from the stimulation. I wish I could say this lasted a long time, but it was quick. About 2 minutes into the oral sex my best friend got what he wanted. A warm stomach filled will cum, and the pleasure of teaching me how to suck dick.

The only thing I learned that day was I needed to learn oral sex or always bring my best friend along.

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Did you enjoy the kinky little snippet of one of my funniest calls? I’ve been ask to tell the rest of it, so here goes the entire story. You might want to get a drink and prepare yourself for the kink that this man indulged in. I don’t shock easy, but this time, I was thankful for the mute button. I used it often.

It was Christmas time, and like all good girls, I was waiting by the phone to hand out the gift of orgasms. Big, little, expensive, and cheap, who doesn’t love to cum? When the phone rang, I thought nothing of it, well, until the sounds of Christmas music blared through the phone. My first thought was someone was someone is in the spirit. The moment he spoke, I knew this was going to be the call of a lifetime.

My Kinky Elf had arrived.

There is a distinct sound to some /little people/, and his voice was just that. The Elf explained how he was dressed in green velvet with the hat, shoes, and even the pointed ears. I found myself drawn into the Christmas magic, well, until he explained the whole roleplay to me. That’s where this all went 50 shades of wrong. I will explain this as he did to me.

“Wweee the North Pole has been busy this year. So many good boys and girls. Santa seems to be spending a lot of time going over his list, so as his number one Elf, I get the job of taking care of the reindeer. I must say the Vixen is looking quite good, but Rudolph, his antlers are going so big and strong. I’ve massaged them, and taken good care of him in hopes that he will take good care of me. His soft velvet feels so good you know.

The taboo aspects of this story might shock you.

I was to play that famous reindeer while he bent over and wiggled his elf ass. Bare as the day he was born, his tushy begging for my soft velvet antlers to rub around his soft flesh. I teases and taunted him, but believe me, a strapon has nothing of a stern thrust of antlers in your ass. He screamed and came while “Santa Clause is cumming to town played. Kinky enough for you? Are you ready to be pegged?

DISCLAIMER: NO animals were involved in this story. It was simply a reindeer headband worn by a HUMAN. Don’t get twisted. I’m not that freaky.

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